Once again I find myself down and out , so I turned to an old friend ..my trusty guitar .. and wrote a song in the way of Wierd Al Yankovic to the tune of Dear Abby by John Prine .


               Dear Abby , dear Abby..

I've stolen this song
my cards are all looked up
and my bets are all wrong
I come off like a big fish
to not one but all
won't you PM a message
or give me a call
                                       si....gned Fishy


             Fishy  oh fishy

you have no complaints
you are what you are
and you aint what you aint
so listen up buster
and listen  you should
stop playing with bad cards
and start playing good

 
               Dear Abby , dear Abby..

my poker game leaks
and the timer it tells me
the players they sleep
each seat that I sit in is dealing me dead
if it weren't for the blinds
I'd sit out instead
                                     si.....gned sore bottom

             sore bottom sore bottom

you have no complaints
you are what you are 
and you aint what you aint
so listen up buster
and listen you should
stop playing with bad cards
and start playing good


             Dear Abby , dear Abby 

you won't believe this
some players are nasty
and some I could kiss
my dog well he tells me
it's all in my head
and that is what tells me 
to write you instead 
                                    si.....gned frustrated

              frustrated frustrated

 you have no complaints
you are what you are 
and you aint what you aint
so listen up buster
and listen you should
stop playing with bad cards
and start playing good


            Dear Abby , dear Abby

who would have thought
that when I was bluffing
I'd ever get caught
was sitting in the big blind
and betting with ease
on the flop I shoved her all in
praying don't call me please

                                   si.....gned busted

             busted oh busted

you have no complaints
you are what you are 
and you aint what you aint
so listen up buster
and listen you should
stop playing with bad cards
and start playing good 

                                   si.....gned Dear Abby

I know I said I would not post because of my lack of knowledge about this wonderful game of Texas Hold'em . But , I was reminded these are my blogs my views and my ramblings and if even only I read it from time to time it's worth putting here. 

That said , once again in the way of " Wierd Al Yankovic " to the tune of  " You Were on MY Mind" by the "We 5 " 

                                                  Poker on MY Mind

Well I woke up
this morning
poker on my mind
I said poker on my mind

Oh I've got
bad beats, oh , oh
I've got
donkeys , oh , oh
I've got
stolen blinds

So I went to the forum
there to fix my game
just to
fix my game

Oh I've got 
bad beats, oh , oh
I've got 
donkeys , oh , oh 
I've got 
stolen blinds  

and I left again 

but I woke 
up this morning
poker on my mind 
poker on my mind 

Oh I've got 
bad beats , oh , oh
I've got 
donkeys , oh , oh 
I've got 
stolen blinds 

and I've gotta feeling 
yeah I'm going 
to lose these blues
yes sir, going 
to lose these blues 

And I tend to
ramble, oh, oh
I've gotta 
discuss,oh, oh
I've gotta talk 
away my blues 

when I woke
up this morning
poker on my mind
uhuh , poker
on my mind 

Oh I've got 
bad beats, oh , oh
I've got 
donkeys , oh , oh 
I've got 
stolen blinds 


 hope y'all enjoyed ...nitevenom 

to the tune of  "Oh Lord it's hard to be humble" by Mac Davis 


Back a little while ago I was
playing at a great poker site and soon
became a level silver player
when one day I logged in
I was back at my old level of blue
so now I too am feeling blue and
picked up my guitar to answer the question
why.......

Oh Lord it's hard to be a donkey
when you play poker everyday
I can't wait to sit at the tables
cause I get better at it each day
If you know me you'll want to play me
I must be a hell of a player
Oh Lord it's hard to be a donkey
but I'm doing the best that I can

I used to be called a big fish
 but with a donk a fish can't compete
with every successful bad beat
well I guess I could play as the other
but it's a donk I'd much rather be
cause I love how the tables fill up
when the folks come just to play me

Oh Lord it's hard to be a donkey 
when you play poker everyday
I can't wait to sit at the tables 
cause I get better at it each day
If you know me you'll want to play me
I must be a hell of a player
Oh Lord it's hard to be a donkey 
but I'm doing the best that I can 

now some folks say I play silly 
or more colorful words of the like
and I could make the right plays if I wanted 
but I wouldn't stand out from the crowd 
the folks say I'm such easy pickings 
not exactly sure what that means
perhaps it has something to do with 
the way I shared my pork and my beans 

Oh Lord it's hard to be a donkey 
when you play poker everyday
I can't wait to sit at the tables 
cause I get better at it each day
If you know me you'll want to play me
I must be a hell of a player
Oh Lord it's hard to be a donkey 
but I'm doing the best that I can 


            I hope you enjoyed 

I was running cold so I took a break and picked up my guitar. Just fooling around as I often do when I heard a song I haven't heard in oh so very long a ballad called ringo.Then I thought maybe I could do in the way of Weird Al Yankovic a ballad of my own . So here it goes to the tune and chords of ringo.... My song , I hope you will enjoy



                                          Johnny Bingo

On the internet across the land
another freeroll was at hand
a way to make free money
a path to milk and honey
I have always been an optimist
so I put my name on the growing list
just under the names of ringo
and another called johnny bingo

    bingooo       Bingoooo

and in the forums I have read
of a player whose infamy had spread
win after win he gained much fame
and all around they feared the name    of johnny   

     bingooo      Bingoooo

I knew one day I'd face the test
to see which one of us would be the best
and sure enough it came around
the game in which I'd face him down
happily I took my seat
and finally I got to meet                       

    bingooo        Bingoooo

silently I gave praise
and from under the gun I did raise
for I knew he'd feel the sting
of my suited ace and king
one by one they began to fall
and only he had made the call

    bingooo         Bingoooo         

the flop came then rainbow ten queen jack
my bet he raised with 2rd's of his stack
I smiled then and shoved all in
I call said he with a great big grin

     bingooo        Bingoooo

we flipped our cards and I could see
he held unsuited  jack and three
I wish I could say I understood
why he thought his cards were good
for to me it read the end
of a player off the bend

     bingooo      Bingoooo

they say his odds were next to none
and the hand was not yet done
he slowly stood up from his seat
as the dealer showed the 3 on 4th street
the crowd began to cheer
and I began to fear

     bingooo      Bingoooo

as the river card was dealt
my eyes glued to the felt
I saw the 3 would you believe
another win he did recieve

     bingooo      Bingoooo

and in the forums again I read
of how his infamy had spread
win after win he gained much fame
and all around they feared the name  of Johnny   bingo

         bingooo bingooo bingoooo                                        


I put yer title right for you. ;)

[Edited By Moderator]