In my teens there was a lot of change. Literally. I used to go to the city centre to tell people on the streets that my mother was an alcoholic, my father was a drug addict, and that I needed money for food. My cup would brimmeth over. My philosophy for school was simple: the sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up. All that change in my pocket taught me a lesson: hard work may pay off in the future, but laziness pays off now. So, ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

If you don't see my point of view, remember these facts. Fifty percent of the people you know are below average. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

From a young age, I had learned to drink in moderation. That is relatively. The relative being my mother. Still, at my age, it was enough to get me drunk most of the time. Where some people see negativity, others see opportunity knocking. By the next time my father came visiting, I had enough money from my visits to the city center to make him my first customer. He used to say,"A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good ". I used to wonder: If God dropped acid, would he see people?

This one time my friend Larry and I were waiting for customers on the street. So, we started to play a game called animal noises. He was like,"Dog". I replied,"Woof, woof". Then I was like,"Cat". He went,"Meow". Then he was like,"Pig". And I went,"Would you step out of the car please, sir".

It was also the time of my first crush. At that time, my dental hygienist was really cute. Every time I'd visit, I would eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she would have to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments. The last time I visited her was the time of my upliftment. Eating all those Oreo cookies had meant that I needed minor surgery, due to which I had to be put under. I went to sleep in her chair with a smile, I woke up surrounded by the cops. A word to the wise: never take to the dentist your evening customer's stash if you know you are going under. It turned out my court appointed lawyer was more interested in getting into the good books of the district attorney than helping my cause. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name. I had to turn in my suppliers' names in return for a lighter sentence. Quite a few up the hiearchy in my organization also took such deals. Instead of any sentence, I ended up on the witness protection program. I didn't even have to testify. I certainly was no eagle.

I didn't do drugs, while I had made a good deal of money selling them. I had escaped a drug rap. I had a drinking problem, but ended giving that up also because I needed to have my wits about me in case my former employers came looking for me. I ended up on the witness protection program which got me out of my neighbourhood and away from my parents. I began to believe that getting caught for selling drugs was the best thing that could have happened to me. God does seem to even take care of those that least deserve it.